Chap. 30 Nyala's Gift

Chap. 30  Nyala's Gift

K'ndar saw Nyala, the Masterherder, sitting by herself at a table.

Ah.

He saw she'd just sat down, so he had time.

He ran back to his weyr, where Raventh was on the beach, watching several dragons cavorting in the surf.

Something is wrong?

No. Nyala is in the dining hall and I am going to give her the choker I've been working on.

He snared it from the shelf in his weyr and ran back.

He was out of breath when he got to the dining hall. "Hmm," he thought, I need to get back in shape!

She was alone at one end of the long trestle table.

"May I join you, ma'am?"

She looked up and smiled. He hadn't realized how lovely she was. When she wasn't in a supervisory mode over him as a tasked Weyrling, her face was disturbingly lovely. She had a serenity in her eye that reminded him of a sleepy ocean.  

"Of course! I was just thinking what a wonderful day it was. What did your family think of the weyr?"

He flushed. Sitting down across from her, he said, "Um, I am glad you brought that up. I'd like to apologize for my sister's behavior. I can't tell you how embarrassed I am."

Nyala patted his hand.

"It's okay. Sometimes little girls get possessive of their horses. I know I was."

"No, it's not that, Nyala. I've never seen her like that. It's my father's abuse. He's a bad father and a cruel man. It's not right what he's doing to her. He's hurt everyone in the family in one way or another." He shook his head.

She could see it was a tender subject.

"Let's change the subject for now. You took Hariko to the market the other day?"

He brightened, glad to change the subject.

"I did!  It was fascinating. A potter named Terylin gave me a pot for my mother. And she had the funniest green fire lizard, named Putza."

"I've heard of Terylin. She's famous, you know, her pottery is known all over Pern."

"Famous?"

"People all over Pern know how beautiful they are. She's very good. For her to give you one is quite an honor."

"Well, I didn't want to just take it, instead, we're going to barter."

"I hope you have something that is equal of value."

"I do," he said, wondering how to broach the subject. He was about to say it when she interrupted.

"She'll probably be here for the Gather. That will be right at Turns' End! If you've never seen a Gather before, it will be twice as big as any Market. There will be so many people here, so much to see and do. And the racing! We're putting a few horses in, I don't think they'll win as they're not specifically bred for racing, but…it's going to be for fun. And if we win, so much the better!"

She laughed. "My dinner is getting cold. If you don't mind?"

"No, of course not! Eat!" he said. The Gather, he thought. The Gather!

A vision of him with her on his arm at the horse racing suddenly popped up in his mind. It was distractingly delicious. Graduation was just before the Gather, so he'd be able to ask her to go with him to the races.  

He watched her surreptitiously, out of the corner of his eye.

K'ndar,stop, he told himself.

But he couldn't help but feel attracted to her. She was just…so…perfect.

 Something is wrong! You are agitated. Are you hurting?

No! I am just looking at a very pretty girl

 Is she a green?

K'ndar laughed out loud, Nyala's eyebrows raising up.

"Let me guess, your dragon said something funny."

"He did. You'll have to meet him someday. He's a lot like my horse back home."

He paused, then pushed on with his decision to give it to her now.

"Speaking of horses," he opened, I hope this doesn't upset you," he said, "but I'm sure you remember the day you had to have the palomino put down."

She frowned for just a moment. He thought it enchanting.

 "Yes. I do. But I'm alright now, she's better off. I thank you again for doing something that was too painful for me."

"It was my pleasure," he said, and dug around in his shirt.

"I didn't tell you at the time, but, I made a gift for you. From her."

He placed the braided horsehair choker on the table.

She picked it, her eyes glistening in wonder. She ran her fingers along it, from the agate that he'd woven into it to form a knotted clasp, feeling the wiry strands cunningly woven into an intricate braid.

"I hope it fits you. I didn't know how to ask to measure your neck."

She turned it over and over. Tears formed in her eyes.

"It's beautiful, K'ndar. It's so beautiful. Did you make it yourself?"

"I did. For you. To heal your heart."

She tried to place it around her neck, fumbling with the clasp. "Would you please?" she asked. He went behind her, took the braid and placed it around her neck. His nerves jangled. He wanted to touch her soft skin. He didn't dare. It wasn't just that he was still a Weyrling, it was also…well, too fast. But this wasn't anything but helping a friend.

It fit perfectly, the snow white hairs contrasting against her dark skin. She felt it, adjusting it to lie perfectly flat. She smiled at him again.

"Thank you, my dear K'ndar. It's beautiful. Thank you so much."

"You're welcome."

He looked long at her. He couldn't help himself. She attracted him. Even her voice was intoxicating.

Just then, a tall man came up to their table. He put his hand on Nyala's shoulder, bent down and kissed her.

"Hello, love, who's your friend?"

K'ndar froze. His mind exploded. He was suddenly in a maelstrom of emotions. Shock, dismay, resentment, jealousy, disappointment, possessiveness, and..fear.

"Harlan, this is Weyrling K'ndar. He was the young man who..who took care of the palomino mare we had to put down. You remember her, she was my favorite."

K'ndar stood up.

"K'ndar, this is my weyrmate, Harlan. He works in the Smithcraft shop."

"Pleased to meet you, K'ndar," he said, sticking out his hand, "I well remember how badly Nyala took losing that mare. You were kind to do that for her."

They shook hands. K'ndar felt the strength in the man's grip. Shaking his hand was like shaking a tree trunk.  There was a friendly look in his eyes, but there was also a visible undertone of warning. It said, beware, youngster, this woman is mine. It was one male to another. He felt like a colt facing up to the herd stallion. 

He gulped and forced himself to say, "And you, sir, pleased to meet you."

"Look at this beautiful choker K'ndar made for me! It's from the mare's tail. Now I have something to remember her by!"

"Lovely work there, K'ndar. You have a talent," Harlan said, but again, there was that unspoken threat, no, unspoken promise of danger. Despite Harlan's eyes on his wife's face, K'ndar could feel an invisible one on him.

K'ndar couldn't drop his eyes, but they were blurred, anyway. He heard himself babbling, talking about how he made chokers, sounding even to himself as if he were speaking gibberish. Giving up, he said, "It's been a pleasure meeting you, sir, but I have to go now."

"No problem, K'ndar. If you like, stop by the smithy and I can show you around." It was said with utter sincerity, but both knew that, unless K'ndar was assigned to the shop as a weyrling,(which at this late date was doubtful),  he'd never dare to cross the threshold into Harlan's domain.

"Sure. I..I think I'd like that. Thank you."

"Thank you again, so much, K'ndar." Nyala said, completely unaware of the hurricane roaring in K'ndar's soul.

"You're welcome, ma'am."

He blindly made his way back to his weyr.

Raventh was waiting. He could hear the emotional tumult in K'ndar's head.

 You are hurting?

Yes. No. I have no way to describe it.

 But you are upset. What happened? Did the girl mate with you?

NO! She is not…she doesn't rise. She has a mate. No. I don't know how to explain it.

Oh, I do. Her mate made me feel….small.

Oh, he did that. At the moment when Harlan had given him THAT look, he felt his testicles shrink to fruit pips. The unspoken acknowledgement of alpha Harlan from beta Kandar. Now he knew how juvenile colts…and dragons..felt, when facing an alpha male.

That is what I felt!  When Sinith rose to mate, I was up in the sky but the adult dragons kept me far away. They made me feel small. They knew what to do. I didn't. Rastabenth was different. Sinith was his and he threatened anyone who came near her. I was afraid!

K'ndar felt his heart soften. How in the world had he managed without Raventh? Who, despite the fact that he was a dragon, not a human, and didn't have the vocabulary…yet…to adequately explain himself, was still capable of comforting him. Like a big brother, with his arm around his shoulders.

He smiled in his mind.

Yes. It was like that. I think I was in love with her. No, I know I was in love with her. Then her mate came and was friendly--but not friendly. He didn't threaten me with words, but I could feel it from his…his mind. I was afraid of him. He made me back off, just like what was done to you

 I know. I feel it. It was like that in the sky. But what is 'love'?

Huh. How to explain something as visceral, something even he had never experienced in quite this way, despite knowing what it was. It was like his mother would say on occasion, I don't know how to describe it but I know it when I feel it.

Ah, Raventh, you pose the most puzzling of question. What is love? Why are you saying these things to me?

The sudden change of the direction of their conversation silenced Raventh for several moments, as he searched for the words he wanted.

You are mine. I am yours. We are each other. I want to make you stop hurting and be happy. When you are happy, it makes me happy. The moment I broke out of my egg, I felt this….feeling for you. I knew you were for me.  Is that 'love'?

Feel this, lizard, K'ndar said. He remembered the feeling he had when they first Impressed and pushed the feeling of love as forcefully as he could into Raventh's mind.

 Yes. What you are feeling is love. And what I feel for you is love

 Then we love each other. As long as you are with me, it is no matter that I was afraid of the other dragons. It doesn't matter that the girl has a mate. Maybe someday I will mate. And you, too. But for now I am happy just being with you. I want you to stop hurting. Want to go swimming?

K'ndar threw his arms around the brown's warm neck. You and your swimming! If I didn't know better I'd swear you were a dolphin. But it's getting late, lizard, we've both had a long day. Let's get some sleep.